How Menopause Messes With Body Image and What Do About It

For many women, perimenopause and menopause bring a surprising and often painful ramping up of body image struggles.

The truth is many, many women struggle with body image their whole lives.

But something happens in menopause. The volume turns up.

The discomfort, the self-consciousness, the doubt — gets harder to ignore.

And yet, it’s still something we rarely talk about.

I hear it from clients. I hear it from friends. I feel it myself, on those days when my reflection catches me off guard.

And the silence? It makes the struggle feel lonelier than it already is.

Why Menopause Hits Body Image So Hard

We know that body image often takes a hit during big life transitions—puberty, pregnancy, perimenopause.

These are times when our bodies change in ways we can’t control and often without much cultural support.

And menopause? It’s a perfect storm of hormonal shifts, life changes, and a society that pretends women disappear after 50.

So if you’ve been feeling unsettled, disconnected, or even ashamed of how your body is changing—you’re not being vain.

You’re not failing.And you certainly are not alone.

Close to 90% of women report feeling dissatisfied with their bodies in midlife!

Why Negative Body Image Matters (More Than Most People Realize)

These changes aren't just about a little midlife weight gain or a few new wrinkles.

They can impact how we feel in our own skin, every single day.

And that ripples out into every corner of life: mental health, sexual health, relationships, self-confidence-how we show up in the world. It takes away our power. And our joy.

Body image issues are linked to:

• Low mood and increased risk of depression

• Anxiety and heightened stress

• Decreased libido (which hormonal shifts can already mess with)

• Avoiding intimacy, socializing, or joyful movement

• Disordered eating patterns, and increase in full-blown eating disorders

• A real sense of disconnection—from our bodies, our joy, and ourselves

And yes, I’ve felt that tug myself—wondering if I should “tighten things up” or go back to old food rules I know don’t serve me.

That old voice doesn’t vanish just because I know better. But these days, I have a built a toolbox of things that I know can help.

How Do We Cope with Body Changes in Menopause?

The first step is to name it. Not shame it. Normalize it.

These changes are a natural part of a biological transition.

But they can also feel deeply uncomfortable. Disorienting, even.

There’s no single fix here—but there are tools. Small, supportive practices you can reach for when your inner mean girl gets loud or the mirror feels unkind.

Here’s what I come back to—what helps me hold these body shifts with softness, not judgment:

1. Move From Appearance to Function

One of the most powerful shifts I’ve made is focusing less on how my body looks, and more on what it does.

This idea—called body functionality—has been shown to boost positive body image, improve mental health, and help us stop seeing our bodies as objects to fix or judge.

Your body is doing so much behind the scenes:

• Beating your heart
• Digesting your food
• Healing from scrapes and bruises
• Hugging your loved ones
• Balancing while you put on pants (seriously underrated)
• Carrying you through tough days

Always there for you. No matter what.

Your body deserves respect—not restriction or punishment.

2. Choose Different Mirrors

And I don’t just mean the one in your bathroom.

I mean your social media feed. The magazines you flip through. The shows you stream.

If all you see are 30-year-old thin bodies held up as the gold standard, it’s no wonder you feel like you’re falling short.

Fill your world with older women who own their wrinkles, who move joyfully, who show up as their full selves—no filters needed.

Here are just a few of the women I love follow:

@louisegreen_bigfitgirl

@idaho_amy

@themiddleagedgoddess

@mannyfashionstylist

@diannebondyyogaofficial.

3. Recognize your Emotions

We mourn our youth in so many ways — old photos, lost opportunities, the shifting of relationships.

But when it comes to our bodies, we often try to “fix it” instead of feel it.

The softening of our bodies, the appearance of wrinkles, the redistribution of weight — these are all reminders that time is passing, and with it, certain versions of ourselves.

We don’t often name this experience as grief, but that’s exactly what it is.

As Kathryn Betts Adams Ph.D., M.S.W., in Psychology Today puts it, “midlife is a time of both “mourning and reinvention” — a stage where we’re called to acknowledge what’s shifting, while also choosing what comes next”.

So instead of jumping straight into “solutions” — new creams, new workout plans, new diets — let’s make space for the actual feelings.

Let’s grieve what’s changing. And then, when we’re ready, let’s gently turn toward what’s still possible.

4. Talk to Yourself Like Someone You Love

When I catch myself saying mean things to myself, I offer a comeback:

“It’s natural for bodies to change-even yours, sweetheart”

“You deserve comfort and kindness—not criticism.”

And if I am really feeling salty, “F@#ck the patriarchy!” (It’s cathartic. And weirdly healing).

This is the work.

Not fixing. Not shrinking. But coming back to ourselves, over and over(and over and over and over!) With kindness.

 Try these 48 Body Neutrality Affirmations to Help You Thrive in Midlife to get you started.

When to Seek Support

It’s one thing to feel a little off in your body—it’s another to feel like you can’t live your life.

If body image struggles are interfering with how you eat, move, dress, relate to others, or show up for yourself… you don’t need to wait until it gets “bad enough” to deserve help.

I always say: if you've already tried making small, supportive changes and you're still stuck in distress, that’s your signal. You’re not weak—you’re worthy of support.

If body image has felt especially challenging during menopause, you’re not imagining it — and you’re definitely not alone.

Unlearning decades of conditioning takes time and practice. A lot of practice. But this work is worth doing — not just for your own well-being, but to help create a different narrative for the generations coming after us.

Small shifts add up. Keep building your toolkit. Keep showing up with compassion. You got this.